Hallowed Ground

The Details:
Director: David Benullo
Runtime: 83 min
Language: English
Color: Color
Format: 1.85:1
Sound Mix: Dolby Digital 5.1
Certification: USA:NR

The Review:
Genius Products, the guys who helped bring us Quentin Tarantino's Deathproof, had a hand in producing this very finished, but incredibly bland, direct-to dvd supernatural horror/thriller. I pulled HG off of the shelf based solely upon the tagline on the box, "You can't bury terror." I don't know if they have a Pulitzer offshoot category for 'most amazingly nonsensical quote that somehow does it's job in getting people to rent a movie', but whoever managed to force that nugget from the right side of their brain should take it home for 2007.

Hallowed Ground takes place in a tiny rural town that is somehow fully functional and yet consists of less than 30 people. Our heroin, Liz, played by Jaimie Alexander, stumbles upon the town of Hope when her car suddenly grinds and whirs, slowing her to a snail's pace and forcing her off of the highway. She progresses slowly down main street, coming face to face with the blank stares of the the townsfolk who obviously do not care for outsiders.


After tending to her car, she runs into a tabloid reporter (ala The Enquirer) who is doing a story on the history of the area. It seems there is a local legend about a preacher who resorted to crucifying unfaithful townspeople and visitors in order to more effectively keep the crows from destroying Hope's livelihood of crops. (a scarecrow that screams bloody murder works better than the silent, hay-stuffed variety) The preacher was eventually caught and was murdered himself, leading people to believe that the area remains haunted by his spirit to this day. The reporter grabs Liz by the wrist, and totes her off to the haunted farmhouse where the story originated. Begin scary stuff here:

(I'm reluctant to reveal any more of the plot, as it definitely sounds interesting, and may inadvertently fool some of you into thinking that it is a tale worth your time.)

Okay, Hallowed Ground has a few serious problems. But the main err was in thinking that the story/setting was sufficiently scary and original enough to create a serious horror flick. Well, it's not. Again, the movie was executed well, the lighting is fantastic, the cinematography was no better than an average television show, and there are actors from multiple backgrounds that bring the bland townspeople to life, but what is happening on the screen isn't original, thought provoking, or meaningful enough for anyone to care.

Instead of genuinely creeping, frightening, or intriguing, Hallowed Ground simply bores. As is evident on the package, the Scarecrow is a main character in the movie. He comes to life and begins to seemingly terrorize the town and Liz. However, the production team decides not to stick with the horror film staple of letting the audience create their own fear by keeping them in the dark. Instead, they present the scarecrow every chance they get. They generally show where he is and what he is doing at all times, which is usually standing around with a pitch fork looking confused.

During the following hour, the story veers away from the stalker/slasher it starts out to be, and takes half a dozen other turns before the lights come up. (and it is just enough to keep you watching, especially if it's your job to do so). Will the ancient prophecy be fulfilled? Will Liz be able to out-whit the crazed religious fanatics? What on earth will happen in the end? Let me go ahead and tell you now: nothing you will remember in a 3 day's time.

I can't recommend Hallowed Ground for any audience. It's not scary enough for anyone over the age of 8, and it does not entertain on any B level whatsoever. Hell, even I can't even make fun of the thing!

Let's help this sorry, sleepy little flick just fade away.



SCRAPE: Pitch-fork on glass=not pleasant.
STUCK: Townspeople from telephone poles!
SIGH: That's it. A measly two payoffs...